The 2009 Trenchie Awards

For the 9th year in a row, it’s my wife’s favorite feature of the site, the 2009 Trenchie Awards.

Best Movie: Taken with Liam Neeson. Actually saw this one in the theater with the lovely and talented Mrs. Trench. Liam Neeson hasn’t kicked this much ass since Darkman. The only thing wrong with it that it was PG-13. If this had been an R it would have been the perfect movie.

Worst Movie: Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li. The original Street Fighter was better. Dishonorable Mention goes to Watchmen for the fact there was no smoking in the movie while smoking played an integral role in the comic.

Best Album: This was a tough one but the nod goes to The Devil You Know by Heaven and Hell aka the Dio era Black Sabbath. Narrowly getting beat out was Endgame by Megadeth.

Worst Album: Play My Game by Tim Ripper Owens. I love Ripper but this album was not anywhere near as good as the Beyond Fear album from a few years ago.

Best TV Show: Batman: The Brave and the Bold. I am a sucker for superhero cartoons and this one didn’t disappoint. I like how they mixed the mythos of the different eras of Batman. Not to mention it did something that no one has ever done before. It made Aquaman interesting. Honorable mentions go to How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory, and Mythbusters.

Worst TV Show: All the dumbass ‘ghost’ and psychic shows that seem to be polluting the airwaves. When Animal Planet even has its own haunted show you know the genre is oversaturated. Not to mention they’re lowering the collective IQ of their audiences.

Dumbasses of 2009: The Teabaggers. To call their little circle jerks Tea Parties lessens the impact of the original Tea Party.

Most Inane Political Agenda of 2009: The Birthers. Obama was born in Hawaii, a U.S. state. You people are just as bad as the people who wanted to see Bush’s National Guard records. You lost the election. Get over it.

Biggest Jackass Celebrity of 2009: Jesse Ventura. He used to be cool. Now he’s just desperate for attention with his idiotic conspiracy show. Occam’s Razor people.

Don’t become a statistic tonight and we’ll do this again next year.

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